Background:

The City of Heaven.
This is a celestial paradise, strictly governed by the priests and military known as Umbillica. More of a country than a city. It is a gargantuan complex that rarely sprawls; breeding has been effectively controlled through Government (which is joined to the hip with Umbillica.) Science (as we know it) is controlled by religion rather than rejected by it. This keeps it a miraculous mystery from the people. Only the divine know how to repair and construct it – explaining it as a “gift from heaven, not to be abused." The most distinguishing feature of Heaven is the immortality. Although the people can die through disease or severe trauma, they cannot age. They are “imbued with the aura of God.” This is an energy that flows through the sky from across the horizon of the White Sea.

In contrast to Heaven is The Wastelands (or informally known as the dirt lands, or dirt world.) This place is nothing more than endless ruins of old cities – lifeless and plagued. No one has ventured out beyond Heaven to this place. Only ‘shadows’ (another military unit) venture out. Why Serpentine
is selected is unknown.

(The society is technologically advanced - more on a "Starship Troopers/Aliens" kind of level rather than Star Wars...)

Umbillica:
Before eternal growth was granted, God provided great teachings to the ancients. “Share creation. Shared world.” It started by the cell, then by the hammer and finally bionics. The foundation and framework of knowledge that is society…Eventually man grew so much they reached God. For their deeds, they were granted the aura of life. The sinners – the destroyers – Vandals of life – were outcast from the city into the lifeless zone without technology or hope. Aborted from the womb. “Each cell of the cord feeds the granted.” Their signature consists of a small symbol of a baby within a dark circle.

Serpentine:
"A glorified deathsqaud." Consists of few members which dealt with most of the heat City of Heaven faced while trying to establish itself. Members of this squad have not spoke for a long time, retiring into quiet lives in society. Due to the long stretches of peace, there has been no need for special operatives. They are forgotten soldiers with nothing more than ancient records to prove themselves. They feature a small tattoo of a snake on the wrist. Will they be ready for a recall?

Plot: Without revealing too much and making it positively dull, basically, the story unfolds as an old combat squad unite and traverse The Wastelands. Their mission: to revive an old power source which maintains the aura of life (which stops human bodies from aging.) This is causing mass panic as the essence is slowly fading and, of course, concerns Umbillica greatly. In addition to this – there are also a couple of advisers selected to join. Their intentions are not completely explained (PM for this role in addition to your profile. Your mission has a few secrets hidden from the others.). So, all squad members of Serpentine will generally lack the big picture of their war efforts. The advisers are most likely to be pacifistic.
Themes: Our characters will explore morality and duty; self will and obligation; honour and glory, and above all, the meaning of sacrifice. What does it take to get things done? What's the limit before saying no? Who decides what is wrong and what is right?
Secondly, is the subtle power of memory: can it justify who we are in the present? Or is it merely a shadow of a former self?
Nature and equilibrium - what is natural and what is not?

Rules:
Erm, well…no “god modding” as usual. Of course, I like to see to more depth than just bang-bang. Combat should be realistically fatal.

No “hijacking” either. It’s better if you regulate your own character’s personality.

I’m interested in words, the creative writing. So there’s no point scoring or HP or anything like that on this. It’s a story for me. That’s all.

Lastly, but leastly. I don’t mind if there’s the OCCASSIONAL short post. (As long a sit doesn’t bother the mods…too much. Only used for dramatic effect or if you don’t want to exhaust every possibly detail your character can see. It’s much better for conversations for interactivity and response. But! That’s no excuse for being lazy and underwriting for all the major key moments. So generally, plenty of meaty paragraphs please for what’s relevant - not for what looks like a lot of writing on the screen. Thanks.

In the interest of fairness. I'll give an extract of the opening - just so people know what they're in for before they decide to...audition I suppose.

It was a considerably cool day of crystal vision and light. The city glittered off trickling water and glass. The clouds had died today and so the White Sea could be seen in the distance beyond the impenetrable wall. Despite this tranquil beauty, the sky seemed dead and grey compared to its former glory; the cleansing aura of life was now too faded to see. Mass panic. Mass hysteria.
A hand dipped in cool water, like sea weed, was gracefully waving contently, feeling the fluid flow between its digits and then into oblivion. The hand belonged to the body of Asp - a strong body of many scars. This body, perched at her regular spot at the edge of her building’s fall (which was similar to a natural waterfall only manmade,) was watching the world like a goddess, observing how things changed so easily and so slowly, like when one watches their garden flourish. Falling…Falling, hypnotically. It must have been the sound of water, splashing into the dark hole of the works, or the simple aesthetic of gravity; it functioned for beauty and as eccentric waterworks which were much different than waterworks of the dirt era. This same hypnotic attack dragged back into her mind (flawed Memories were obsolete, technically invalid; technically improvable, images prone to being manipulated or distorted.) If there was any shred of history, it would exist only in data, encrypted and hidden in the Vault. She could distinguish the when, possibly the how but she could never distinguish the why.


Oh. And it's a Normal RP.

Name (or current alias): Yuree
Codename: Edge
Age: Documented
Gender: Male
Appearance: Well built physique due to military experience, short black hair, vertical scar running down his left eye, which is a fake, technologically advanced to be able to zoom great distances for sniping purposes. Clad in black pants and black leather jacket.
Weapon: Advanced long distance weaponry, sniper rifles.
Personality: Quick to pick up on fears and weaknesses. He's brutally honest, which is often mistaken for malice.
Biography: A former elite military sniper, he was discharged after being clinically declared mentally unstable. He used whatever free time he had after his military career keeping his skills honed, gradually falling down mentally towards a psychopathic nature he started practising on innocent animals. He has no friends or living relatives and lives alone, making his money by hunting animals for food.


EDIT: Added codename.

Name (or current alias): Kiya
Codename: Snow
Age: Documented, appears to be mid-late twenties
Gender: Female
Appearance: Standing at 5'6 with a slim but curvy physique, Kiya's facial features are clearly modified, giving her feline eyes and slight pointed ears to enhance both her vision and hearing. Her skin is a pale Caucasian tone, with blue irises and pale bonde hair, giving her a gentle and delicate appearence to suit her profession. Her outfit is a standard medical uniform with a high collar white tunic with gold trim and dark blue full leg pants which cover her from hip to toe, the tunic over-lapping so the only exposed skin on her body is her face. The only other visable thing on her is a small visor attached to her temple which allows her to analyse paticents and organic material.
Weapon: Being both of the Church and of the medical profession Kiya doesn't really carry a weapon, however in times of need she can use her defibulator gloves to stun, paralyze or if in contact for long enough in the right places, kill and opponent. These gloves are built in to her uniform for easy use in emergancies.
Personality: Softly-spoken, peace-loving, and very differcult to anger or even upset, however she can make the most cutting remarks while the most innocent of smiles on her face. When faced with a situation, her innate skill for processing information at great speed really shines.
Biography: While still on active duty, Kiya's whole appearence was designed for a ward nurse, to the point she can no longer remember what she looked like originally. Unfortunately she has seen combat over the years, when there was a incident which forced her to defend her patients and fellow nurses, thus she was reassigned as a military medic as she showed the ability to adjust to such situations far better than she was originally designed for and her prescence had a positive affect on morale. With peace now set in the City of Heaven, she has been allowed to seek solace and meditation within the halls of the Umbillica.

Name (or current alias): Zack
Codename: Rock
Age: Documented
Gender: Male
Appearance: Long brown silky hair, a small goatee on his chin. A headband with metal plate over his forehead, his tight fitting cameo tank top with matching cargo pants. His muscles are very developed with plastic explosives in all of his pockets in his pants.
Weapon: Shotguns, Explosives.
Personality: A natural follower, he speaks only if needed or asked. He keeps to himself but works well with others. He is slightly deaf in his right ear after a bad explosion.
Biography: A former demolition expert. He left for unknown reasons and began to live a simple life alone. Kept to himself and made sure to stay out of trouble, not much else is known.

These are excellent characters! (whom I can see complimenting and conflicting with each other very nicely). Immorality, amorality and morality. Duty and insubordination. It's looking good!

There is something I forgot which thanks to a certain someone's email has reminded me. Besides military and advisers, there is also the outside world. If you want to consider being...very different - someone sub human perhaps - then pm and we'll work something out. I haven't really mentioned anything on the outside world, purely for surprise factor.

Name: Leon
Codename: Keen
Age: Undocumented
Gender: Male

Appearance: He is white, appears to be in his mid thirties though his face is creased and stressed. A dirty, rough complexion is stretched over a bald head, covered in scars. Generally unkempt and unshaven. He is short, 5'9'', thin, but stocky. Extensive prosthesis has replaced more than ninety-five percent of his body; limbs, organs, muscle structures, bones and eyes. Parts of his brain have been heavily modified, allowing higher reasoning and rapid learning. Tattooed onto the remaining organic skin on his neck is "Memento Mori: Carpe Diem", and his synthetic arms bear a black ram's head in a circle.

Weapon: Primarily a rifleman, Keen is armed with an assault rifle and either a high calibre revolver or suppressed sub-machinegun. His right arm contains a covert, single shot blunderbuss that can fire any number of objects. Keen is capable in a number of other fields, particularly marksmanship and is proficient with almost any arms. He is fully versed in hand to hand combat and though archaic, his physical augmentation makes him more than capable of tearing a man limb from limb.

Personality: Very intelligent, fast and is a superb leader. However, he is quiet and complex; malevolent, brooding, brutal and sadistic. He obsesses with torture, voyeur, and has a lust for flesh, the taste of blood, for pain and for death.

Biography: Crippled and broken, his donor body was built on an æon before Heaven existed, a relic from an ancient conflict. He is not aware of his history before Indoctrination, though Umbillica have some sketchy records. These pertain to his creation in a vast war tens of thousands of years in the past. He is one of the few remaining of his kind, a last resort or final weapon of the Vintergatan, a Stalker. Due to constant replacement of worn out organic parts, he is not reliant upon the Aura to maintain his life.

(This rp looks sweet can't wait to kick ass)
Name: Henry Tasker
Alias: Scorpion
Age: Documented. Physically looks about 41.
Gender: Male

Appearance: He has jet black hair with hints of grey styled in a crew cut with a long ponytail. His face is well defined with a strong chin and a dimple, with eyes that are warm and thoughtful with hidden sorrow. His body, muscular and broad, can lift any weight within reason. The clothes he wears are tattered and war torn, dark urban camo.

Weapon: Heavy. Scorpion will be issued a heavily armoured metal suit with retractable dual mini guns and a rocket cannon, a human tank, with a high calibre pistol side arm.
Personality: Moral sanity. Social guy (that’s why he likes to teach.) Witty and light hearted. He’ll take most things on the chin, often responding to orders in a light fashion. The only thing that can break through his happy surface is abuse of justice. This outrages him utterly. (when evil rightfully escapes through red tape and regulations.) Often hums music.

Biography: He spent much of his time as a child studying music. Eventually decided to become a music teacher when he retired from Serpentine. He was married once but got divorced as they grew apart. His daughter consulted Umbillica and demanded to change her identity so she could disappear on her father. Now spends most of his time setting up regular barbecues for friends. His flaw is that he wishes resume an old life of glory and fun. He’s soon to be shocked by the pain that will head his way. He tries to share his idea of fun with Asp but she’s always too concentrated on the mission. Now that the fun is steadily declining, returning to Serpentine appears to be the saving grace which may maintain his happy and friendly attitude – while serving his duty of Heaven and saving many from death.

For reference, I decided to separate this from the main body of text.

Name (or current alias): Asp

Age: Documented

Gender: Female

Appearance: Dark purple hair. Red eyes. She appears to be roughly 25. Her milky soft skin is only surpassed by her silky hair. Her pale complexion compliments the morbid aura that surrounds her while her lips have been stained a deep purple, which in certain lighting look pure black. Asp is physically well proportioned.

Weapon: Envenoma Gear - a nostalgic and symbolic method of ending life. Consists surgical-like needles that are integrated into small, compact areas of the combat uniform. This delivers the specified venom into the target upon penetration. Requires vials and frequent cleaning. In emergencies, these needles can be 'spat' at the target. Not all her weaponry is so archaic, predominately, she uses a standard Assault rifle backed up with powerful side arms.

Personality: "Angels and Demons circle round her head." Secretive and taciturn. A careful observer. She prides herself on diligence and concentration. She's a selfish idealist although she can't quite understand why. She is serious to a fault in that work and temporary issues seem to envelop her being. On the face of things, she is accepting of the world; the more unfulfilled life becomes, the more she tries to convince herself she’s fine with it. She spends a lot of time thinking in her head than in reality.

Biography: A forgotten combat veteran. She is leader of the currently non-existent Serpentine – “a glorified death squad.” Her reputation exists only in military records. She cannot remember her past experiences vividly. She has been married to seven husbands and has been entitled to two ovaries by the government for her merit. However, she never did find any desire to give birth…an opportunity long past. Over generations she has undergone slight genetic modification. She cannot remember why but presumes it was for aesthetic reasons, conforming to the fashion of that era. However, she is aware of her own abnormally high level of perception and agility. She is well versed in ancient, archaic weaponry, that is poisons.

Outside, in the chaos of life and death which is the Wasteland, terrible powers vie for control over the masses, what remains of those who were left behind, forever excluded from the man-made paradise of The City of Heaven. The official teachings claim that these are the descendants of the unclean, those judged unworthy of entry into immortal life, and now have degenerated into something much less than human. From among the outcast there comes one who calls himself Yarl, self-proclaimed priest of an unknown entity named only as The Blind Fiddler. Swathed in torn robes, thin and nearly skeletal of body, he is completely hairless. It is unknown whether he has evolved or was changed in some way, but it is disturbing to look into his colorless eyes which always seem to be staring through and past whatever he is looking at. None can guess his age, but he appears to be older than a child but younger than the Old Ones, smooth of skin but with knotted muscles and strange scars which suggest either a long and hard life or evidence of some terrible ritual. His mouth is twisted in a constant grin, even while asleep, and those which encounter him quickly find some reason to move on, although if asked later they cannot explain why. He mutters constantly about some far-off city, Ilek-Vad, but will not or cannot say where this place is found. Many think him insane, but the truly wise see that he is not and are chilled by the strangeness of him and the place from which he must have come. He leans upon a stout staff, which itself is carved in intricate and arcane symbols, although it appears to be nothing more than a walking stick. He does not appear to be crippled, but still leans upon his staff heavily as if he has difficulty walking. He carries no other weapons or equipment, and none has ever seen him eat or drink anything.

Nothing else is known about this one, for none has ever felt comfortable enough to ask him of his obviously strange and alien life. Most would avoid him if they could, for he sets them at great unease merely by his presence, even those among whom he lives out in the terrible darkness, if such a place can truly be said to harbor life. Though they might have wished to never meet him, the brave soldiers of Serpentine will find themselves somehow stuck with him, for One has sent him to either help or hinder them upon their quest...

[This is the first draft of my character sheet-- I despise simple lists, but am not in the proper frame of mind to make a good story out of my character's introduction. I tried to get all the facts in, and if anything major is missing then I'll rewrite it, something I may end up doing anyway. Needless to say, this character will not be introduced to the IC until the soldiers are well out from the city, and I shall be certain to have it properly edited by then... Just wanted to get into the thread before it was too late... Please tell me if anything is too far off of the story's premise or does not make any sense, either by PM or here in the thread. Thanks!]

EDIT: It is good to see that the IC is up and running! Now, just to find a way to write my character into it all, vague and strange though he may be...

Indeed! Although Grim, you might need to wait a while prior to making an appearance. Understandably, the story has to get there.

As for all characters...wow! I couldn't ask for more! Different, interesting and well thought out.

Of course, sir, of course. As long as the general idea is approved (which I would have polished and perfected if I'd had more time), I'll make a proper introduction. It will be timely and will mesh with the current plot, and I may even go so far as to edit my OOC post to give Yarl a proper background.

Yes, yes. Oh, I believe I'm supposed to say this: everyone, so far, is approved for the RP.

OK. As soon as everyone makes an opening in the hideout, the action will cut to the moment of lift off. So if you haven't joined yet, you can appear there, all strapped up and ready.

Name (or current alias): Halfeb
Codename: Piolet
Age: Documented
Gender: Male
Appearance: Slender yet musculer at the same time. He has a scar running down over his right eye. He usually has a good five o'clock shadow. He has scars across the right side of his torso going to his arm.
Weapon: Mechanical arm has interchangable weaponery systems, as well as tools he can use for repairs on vechiles and machines, along with a scanning device.
Personality: Blames himself alot, quiet, loner.
Biography: Halfeb worked in the Umbillica as a piolet for the most dangerous missions, until one day, over the wastelands, he was flying into a battle and his ship got shot down. He lost everyone in his crew and was teleporting cause he wasn't careful enough to avoid enemy fire. He never wanted to have lives on his head, which is why he staied away from direct combat and kept to pioleting. The crash left him mangled, taking his arm and most the right side of his torso.
When they got him back to the city, they were able to fix him with cybernetics, and make him part of an experimental cybernetics program, making his arm a deadly weapon. Halfeb never wanted that though, he now has something that kills as part of him as his heart and soul, something makes him feel sick to his core.
He is allowed to live a civilans life so long as he tells no one about his arm and abilities. However his arm and the nanaites made him relise something. All this religion was a lie. Sciene was the real truth. He desided to keep this to himself in fear that he would be thrown into the wastlelands for his views. He now lives in a small apartment in the city, trying to drink his memories away.
-------

The Titan flew straight as a die, just as he had fixed it to. He loved that ship, it was a part of his heart and soul and was like another one amoung his crew.
"Piolet, we have something coming up head, about 1 mile before the land site." A voice said over the coms. Halfeb didn't think anything of this. He picked up the com device and spoke into it.
"Don't worry COM. I'm sure its nothing. Just chill." He said into the com device. Suddenly, the Titan shook, alarms went off. They had been hit, the Titan was going down. "Status report!" Halfeb yelled into the com device, but, it was too late. The coms room had been hit. Another violent shake as the Titan was hit again. He could here the screaming of his crew as they burned behind him. The smell, was indescribably horrific. He looked forward, twisting the controls to try and stop the titan from crashing, but it was hopeless, the ground was coming up too fast at the front screen. The screams, the smell, the ground, he screamed just before he hit.

He shot up in his bed. He calmed himself. He put his head in his hand. He could feel the nanites trying to calm him down too, releasing calming pharamones into his brain. He sighed, realising how fake this sence of calm was. He rubbing his temple, trying to feel what was real. He did feel something real, he could feel an ache where his body stopped and the cybornetics started. He massaged it, feeling flesh then mental. He couldn't even tell if he was real or not anymore. He pulled back to covers and sat on the edge of his bed. He took a second, the thought of another day in this so called perfect world. He stod up and walked over to his wardrobe and oved his hand over the opening mechinism. Inside were two outfits, is army uniform and his everyday street clothes. He looked at his uniform for and a second. He then screamed and knocked it off the hook. He took a second to calm down again and hung it back up before grabbing his everyday wear and got dressed.

Name(or current alias): Mutt

Gender: Male

Age: undocumented

Appearance: He is about 6ft, and weighs about 160lbs. His hair is is butt length, messy, and thick. It is a dark blonde color. His right eye is blue, and his left is green. He has a few small scars on his arms for reasons he won't mention, and a large scar on his chest that curves from his neck, around his right nipple, and down to his belly button. He has a very small muscle structure, though plenty of muscle, and a large bone structure, with no fat on his body. His right ear is peirced three times, and his left 5 times. He wears simple torn pants, with no shoes, socks or shirt.

Weopon: Whatever he can find.

Personality: Honest, and kind hearted. Though he keeps to himself about the scars and gets quite when you mention them.

Biography: N/A

OK. Wuffykai has informed he won't be joining us. With his permission, I've decided to operate his character myself.

Name (or current alias): Eito
Codename: Juno
Age: Documented
Gender: Male
Appearance: Of eastern heritage, Eito is 5'4". He appears to to be around 27 years of age, athletic and muscular through years of extensive training in Shaolin. Eito's brain has been significantly augmented to improve reaction and visual perception, as well as having synthetic bone replacement to improve strength.
Weapon: Largely hand to hand, he is armed with two Kama's and throwing knives. He is proficient with firearms, he prefers to use handguns though still carries a lightweight assault rifle.
Personality: Applies himself to fight for the 'greater good', though this is largely to him, about survival of the fittest.
Biography: Back ground unknown. He does not divulge his past to anyone. People, however, have suspicions of events that may have caused him to become detached from reality.

Too late to join?

Name: Duke
Age: 32
Gender: Male

Appearance: Duke stands six foot tall, his hair blond, his eyes green. He wears a black leather coat, over a simple white t-shirt and jeans.

Weapons: Unseen until drawn, Duke has twenty daggers upon his person; two up either sleeve (4), three on the small of his back (7), one in each boot (9), one on each shoulder, within the coat (11), three on each side of the interior of his jacket (17), and three upon the back of his belt (20). These daggers are balanced for throwing. He also has a large handgun (think Cerberus, but with just one barrel), upon his left hip.

Personality: Duke is somewhat morose. He was forced into service, and acts thusly. He tends toward vices; he smokes, is a womanizer, loves his drink, and gambles. However, he is, at the core, a big softy.

History: Duke was trained as a thief. He made a good run at it, except his vices kept him poor. Eventually, he was caught in the act of pillaging, and was taken to jail. While there, he was given a choice. Either be put to death, or embark on a likely fatal quest in the wastelands. Duke choose the wastelands.

Right. Jazz, firstly, welcome to the RP. Although, sadly and I have to agree, a lot of people are surprised by your character. Now, all my RPer buddies have talked with me via some way or another by either PM or MSN. However, you have just dived straight in without even consulting me, and with a character I find hard to take seriously. I am optimistic and will give your character a chance, although I would suggest you take a new role perhaps, such as a character that has lived in The Wastelands throughout his life, an adviser or perhaps as a member of the Black Ops. If you do so, for the sake of the stories sync - your character will probably be killed off in some dramatic way or another.

That brings me to my next point which I think is something worth discussing (and debating): Death.

Not that everyone is destined to get murdered off when I feel fit (although that would be a lot of fun:P), I do feel it's potential, if you know what I mean. Death can occur in numerous ways. One, is that you know you are leaving the RP. Tell us in advance and I or someone else will try their best to take up the role. If the character proves vital to the plot's development - they'll probably live. If not, I think we would all agree it's easy they just die heroically for the sake of realism or get lost forever in the desert. Nothing like a sad ending for a story.

Secondly, if you disappear from the RP for a month or two without any reason (and I cant' contact ya) then I or someone else will also assume the character and decide their fitting fate in relation to the story.

And lastly, if it takes your fancy - you could just accept that some event may be too much to survive and lose to it. Perhaps start in the mind of a new character, or spectate the others? Again, your choice.

Sorry everyone; I have been RPing on another site for quite some time, and am ignorant of how this site was run. Plus, it's not noted anywhere. So, seeing that no one got an approval response, etc, I was inclined to just jump in. After all, it is easier to seek forgiveness than permission. I am more used to using the OOC than a PM system; once again I apologize.

Futhermore, regarding my character being hard to regard as "serious", try me. He's different from the rest of the crew, and on purpose. I don't like just blindly following the mold; and he has already shaken up the RP, adding some conflict. Which, we all know, is the heart of a good story. Plus, going into hostile territory to explore a possibly destroyed building without a trained thief?

As a side note, what is your official policy on Bunnying, or hijacking, for this RP? Twice already, my character has been cornered and not given the chance to react. As a professional thief, it makes sense that he would have the reflexes to dodge either attack, and especially the second because he was on alert already. That's why I stole the cigarettes. Duke's not meant to be taken lightly, or as a punching bag.

Now, I don't mean any of this to be inflammatory. And, I do seriously apologize for not following the custom on this site.

Firstly (And yes, this is in complete mockery of our fearless leader), I'm going to take a moment to laugh at that double post. Teehee. Bwahaha. Ok, now I'm done. Secondly, I am still alive and interested in this thread just in case anyone was wondering. Thirdly, I was wondering if Jazz (since he is being kicked out of the city) would be interested in acting as some sort of guardian to my dark priest character (for whom I have yet to post a proper character sheet)... After all, this guy would not be very physically strong, and other than the guile of his words and the favors which his masters grant him, he would be rather vulnerable to every-day, normal physical dangers. I am not talking at all about a servant... after all, what would a powerful knife-throwing warrior want with some cult-leading charlatan? I mean more that he would be a companion, maybe someone who was thrown out of the city, maybe an ex-soldier who already had these great skills or someone who was corrupted and changed by the evil which dwells in all those who serve the Old Ones...

*note* If mr. Jazz does not reply here in the OOC, I'll contact him by PM. (you reading this Jazz? let me know what you think!)

Just an idea.


[EDIT: I should have read all the IC posts before writing this, but my idea still stands. I like Duke much more than most of you shallow characters, and will seek to turn him to my side through lies and trickery. Of course.]

Jester and I talked via PM.

Just FYI

Stealing cigarettes from Keen would result in being slugged in the back of the head. In addition, as he is a prosthetic war machine not a human character , it's not beyond the realms of possibility that he is very quiet and adept at sneaking around.

I think the problem was not that you didn't fit the mould; Duke doesn't fit the era. It's as though you're role playing a fantasy character in a sci-fi setting tens of thousands of years in advance of the present... It's a good character, I just find it hard to suspend disbelief and imagine that a ex-con thief would be joining a crack military squad. Aside from that, a character like that would have been perfect in the wastelands, where there is mythology and extraordinary characters such as Duke.

Firstly Jazz, by "conflict", I meant that to mean in the R.P, not outside of it. You have shaken up the RP, and arguably tainted the verisimilitude. I would not mind so much, lots of people like to be something different. Neko Oni for instance wanted to be a trained rookie with an interesting story, but at least he conferred with me.

Right, if anything then I need to be stricter in publicising who is in and who is not.

Now…hijacking…It’s relative. I always thought of it as controlling another character’s actions, mind and decisions rather than imposing a physical action upon them. I see it as fairly acceptable as long as it’s not a detrimental action. For example, a prod is a bit different from blowing out someone’s brains.

Deadhead. Delete or alter that post. Let Jazz be.

Edit: I am jaded. This is not aimed at anyone in particular but if the straight jacket is too much for you all or it’s too shallow, too full of nonsense or whatever then do the intelligent thing and avoid this abysmal story! (There’s plenty of wonderful RP’s to choose from.) If anything, ye can leave with a smile and surpass it with a well thought-of RP, maybe even with one of your own.

Sorry, but his character is pretty aweful. And even though it is in the game, the arrogance his shows is unbelieveable. It isn't even in the slightest, tasteful. The clothes he is wearing are matrix stylings and the whole knives thing etc is just a copy of any sci fi theif. He is like some inbred cross between 'V', from V for Vendetta and any other 'up their own arse' action figure. And rightly so Deadhead should have shot him. He clearly led up to it in the start, if he would choose to do as he did. It's perfectly fair. He decided how he should act and he reaped the consequences. Simple as. And the literary use isn't the best either.

"First, he put on his boots, to protect his feet from the wet ground, and then his jacket, to protect his body."

I'm sorry, but well DUH! I never use that damn phrase and I hate the fact that I have had to use it.

"Duke looked the woman up and down... and smiled. At least he would have some female companionship on his long forced journey. And, a medical officer; she knew how his body worked. He considered telling her how and when and how thoroughly she could give him a whole body check, but thought better of it. She was military, they all were. Instead, he merely gave her the basics. "

Still, yet more arrogance and essentially smut. No subtlety what so ever. He is just looking to be hard ass lead role who gets all the girls. It's just embarrassing to read some of the crap he spouts.

Deadhead is in full rights to take advantage of the fact that he did something against him. He is in his rights to take his own course of action, as Jazz did by entering the forum without a confirmation. I did post before I was confirmed, but I was confirmed shortly afterwards by the man himself.

And I full stick by it. Sorry if it offends, but frankly, it has offended me first off.

...

I see.

...

I came in as a writer, to be interesting and broaden my horizon. If you don't like my character, so be it. In your quest to shoot me down as a want to be "macho-man," you have merely proved your wish to do the same. My character has been hijacked for the last time; on any other site your blatant disregard for the ideas and rights of another writer would get you kicked off.

However, I'm not too insulted by being killed off by a group that can't even spell the word pilot correctly. Or awful. Or anything, really.

Black leather is older than the Matrix.
Knives are older than V for Vendetta.

I'm not sorry that I describe my actions in my posts.
I'm not sorry that I use characters who do not fit the mold.
I'm not sorry that I attempt to add depth and character to a role play.

If I were as much an ##### as you, I would have Duke thrust upwards, his dying action taking out the bastard who attacked him without provocation.

I was NOT kicked out by the GM. I'm sorry to Spiral, for joining in a wrong way. I am also sorry that you have to deal with such a group as this.

I was under the impression that RPing was about co-operation, understanding, and creating a group story. You should feel very proud for proving me wrong.

I will not be back. You've managed to "scare me off." I hope you're proud.

For those who were going to get involved, but have not yet posted your bios, don't. It's not worth it.

I bid you all good life, and good learning. But mostly, good learning.

I would most certainly say that you weren't adding depth, merely an extension of your ego. And it isn't describing the actions, it is the way you described them. It was just poor. I'm sorry, but a three year old could have written that. Besides, this only happened because you created an egotistical character that wasn't actually approved before you joined. Good luck in your future ventures. If anyone else will except what we were supposed to.

It was like an old man buying a fast car. Basically.

As for those who wanted to join but haven't posted their bio's - it's worth it. Just don't solid-lift a fantasy character from Hellsing and dump it straight into a sci-fi role play without reading up on it or waiting for confirmation. Christ, he didn't even change any of the details.
No, you were not adding depth, you were adding the RIDICULOUS. Seriously. Go find me a special forces unit that is topped up with untrained thieves. Seriously. Go for it.
I think the word pilot was misspelled on purpose, and if it was by accident it was continued for convention. Had you not noticed that everyone's command of English as so far is far superior to yours, particularly regarding your grammar and use of words.
You're just bitter because you couldn't do any better than to copy a well used, boring, irritating and frankly shite stereotype. Duke appears in every b-film made by every third rate director.


To Ash - I'm sorry, I didn't see that post. If you would like me to remove it now, I will, but personally I think seeing as he's buggered off we should leave it be. Besides, it's interesting plot.

OK. Enough criticism... If he returns soon, then we'll undo that post. Otherwise, let's just let all of this pass. As for anyone else who reads this - ignore our persuasion - simply read the story itself. That should be your judgment.

I'm not just anybody, so I'll add in my two cents.

I am not pleased that a roleplayer has been chased away by members of the community.

I have read the OOC and IC both just to understand the matter, and I will have to say that all that aggression is completely uncalled for. If you have a problem with another's character or posts, you discuss and ask for things to be changed (which Spiral did), not attack that person's abilities or intelligence.

Although it was not specifically stated in the RP forum rules or by Spiral, killing off another person's character without permission while the roleplayer is still present is very rude and usually banned. You can argue that that's the only logical consequence after taking the action and your own character's personality all into consideration, but surely your brilliant mind can find some way, in or out of the roleplay, to get out of such an awful predicament that would result in the unfortunate act of murdering another character without permission.

If you want to argue that Jazz started all this by entering without permission, please scroll back up to read his post where he explained and apologized for doing so, and Spiral agreed to give him a chance. Personally, I would call that giving approval, although it is not a completely comfortable one.

All that said, I do not want to see any character killing that is uncalled for or assaulting of another roleplayer. Conflicts are normal and allowed for development of both plot and roleplayer interaction, but not on such a scale.

Understand that I do not want to override the roleplay creator's authority, which I often took pains to strengthen, but I will take action the next time I see something similar to this little incident. I am not often this autocratic, you can ask any of my long-time roleplayers that, but I am not in the mood to be nice because somebody was not playing nice.

You have all the right to post whatever opinions you have about the situation or me, but at the same time, it is my right to not accept them.

Thank you for your time, and have a good day.

That seems fine. I may admit that I did overreact, but it did annoy me quite a lot, and though I do agree he maybe shouldn't have killed him, it was clear in the last panel that if he did do anything then he would be killed. It should have been fully understood. I didn't want to drive him away, I wouldn't mind him simply changing his character, as in actually changing it, not just re-skinning it. I have nothing to apologise for as I still think how I said I do. But my intention was not to throw him out, just remake his character.

I honestly do appreciate your leniency on this matter.

Thank you for you input.

Against my better judgement, I am back.

Thank you Seluna.

Special thanks to you, Klya.

The attitude in the first part is probably not necessary, by the way. The new post sounds a lot better. I'm glad your thinking harder.

Righty. Sil, ye are approved. Although I know your character's role in this, you'll still want to write up a bio for referance.

Okay, I just realized something, i was using the wrong name for my character, so I jsut went back and changed all of were I said Tommy, to Mutt. Oops, wrong name.

When the party is weakest, directly after such a terrible crash, the time is ripe for an attack by wild beasts or wasteland savages. By night terror stalks the ruined land, and within ancient rings of standing stones strangely-shaped creatures make obescience to grotesquely-carved monoliths, which drip with a noxious green slime even out here where nothing will grow.

In other words, yes I am still planning on joining this IC... and it will be odd. Just don't be in too much of a hurry to bury those corpses, for the body of a citizen of the city could be a powerful bargaining chip... Just a hint.

(Give me a shout if you want me to write the attack scene, Spiral. If not, I'll be watching for it. Best of luck surviving and all that.... )

Awwww! More paperwork for Kiya... *evil grin*

I quite agree. Could be interesting. Can't we just sling the wasted soldiers at you? We don't exact ally... need them.

Kiya: And long may you rest in peace... Pull!
soldier corpse goes flying
Kiya: Next!

Sorry, mental images while hyper on sugar must be documented.... heeheeheeheehee!

I have now [un]officially joined the IC, although I have yet to actually introduce my character. Having decided that this is the perfect time for half-human creatures to attack the party, most likely with very little success as they are coming up against a highly-skilled combat force, I have simply begun with a little bit of foreshadowing to place my character properly as a dubious friend or (most likely) obvious enemy of their efforts when he is finally revealed. Sitting upon the throne of Ilek-Vad, his master will be very interested to hear of the latest unfolding out in the wastelands, which I have referred to as desert based on two things: First, the description as wastelands suggests some kind of place where there is not much life, and second the character Mutt runs through sand in his attempt to help the fallen passengers. This does not mean that I am trying to make the whole wasteland an endless desert of windblown sand, but rather I would think that a certain amount of desert would be a natural part of any proper wasteland. Suffice it to say that soon ruined cities and fallow farmlands may come into view, but for now we are in a desert of dunes and wind and sand. If this is a problem I would be happy to change my post, as long as someone would be so kind as to tell me of such...

[EDIT] Just in case it matters to anyone, I will probably not be able to post very frequently, except on weekends. I can manage once per day during the week, though, so if there are any action scenes then just assume that I'll pick up on them later, and I'll try not too leave any open ends in my posts, so to speak...

I am very sorry to everyone. I'm such a terrible organiser of this whole thing. I sort of fell off the edge of the world when my computer died and I was just too depressed to fix it again. Anyway! I'm keen to redeem myself so I hope you can forgive my blips so far!

Anyway! Thanks Grim, I love your ominous contribution. I like that idea of ransom. Especially as the spectrum of morality gets more confusing. Perhaps, there could be a difficult choice for whether or not we leave the injured at the site? Ready to be picked up. That's one possible storyline!

Would it be alright if I added another character not from the city, perhaps a companion of Grim Jesters? If so, here is his info, if not, jsut tell me, and he will be dead, forever lost before his birth... Yargh!!

Name(or current alias): Riot

Gender: Male

Age: Undocumented

Appearance: He appears to stand at about 7'6"-8'. It's hard to tell because if the way he slouches. His has no hair on his head, and a strange symbol is tatooed on his head. It weaves to cover his entired body. The tatoos seem to twist and swirl constantly around his body. He has a strange bracelet around his wrist. It also has strange sybols that represent the words "Forever bound, a slave of fate. Betrayed his kind, his price his service." His body is very large boned and he has broad shoulders. He weighs about 400lbs of solid muscle. His face is brute looking, his left eye a hollow socket with a large scar stretching above and below it. His mouth has been sewn, then burnt shut. He has no nose, or ears, there are simply scars in their place. The tips of his fingers have been cut off, and in their place are metal looking claws with more strange symbols carved into them. He only wears a loin cloth over a coth strap used to cover his private area. He will occasionaly wear a long hooded black cloak to cover his monstrous features though.

Weopon: He uses the claws on his hands and brute power to his advantage. He also has a few abilities granted to him through dark worship. But we will learn about those later.

Personality: He is emotionless almost.

Biography: He lived his entire life devoted to the dark cult. But, when he reached the age in which he would become an official member of the cult. But then he betrayed them. They cut out his left eye for spying, cut off his ears and his nose, and when he tried to speak against them, they sewed his mouth shut, then poured hot led over his lips, burning them shut forever. They soon began to try and control his mind. After about three years of the mind washing process, they gave him a slave bracelet with the words engraved on it "Forever bound, a slave of fate. Betrayed his kind, his price his service." Now he follows a preist of the dark cult as a mind slave to the great stone idol.

Note: I am aware that it is imposible for him to eat without a mouth, so I came up with a way to fix that. He is fed by injection directly to his stomache. It is a liquid substance that contains the basic protein and vitamins.

I hope this character gets approved, because (and how awkward for me...) I have already written him into my latest post... In some form, at least, Yarl ought to have a few companions to aid him in his quest to ruin all that Umbillica stands for, be they other denizens of the Wasteland or defectors from among Serpantine itself...

*Hint, Hint*

I don't mind you introducing him into your post. I will do a more formal introduction in some manner that will show his 'Traits', that is if he gets approved. OH, I forgot to mention this in his description, so I will edit it in, but he is fed by injection directly into his stomache.

I'm going to give this one week for a response to show that this roleplay is not dying/dead. If I don't get any, I'm going to close this, alright?