~Broken Love~

Bright as the setting sun,
you shine within me.

White like the full moon at night,
you betrayed me.

Dark as the shadow on the wall,
you have made my heart black.

Free as a butterfly,
my soul has left me.

Broken like a glass,
my heart will never be whole.

Red as a rose,
my new love shows.

Bright as the rissing sun,
he shines within me.

Though a new day has come,
i shall always remain broken.

Quite an accomplishment to have a poem published, so first off I’d like to congratulate you on that. Secondly, and not to nit-pick or anything, but you spelled betrayed wrong >.o I usually don’t point these things out unless it’s in poetry, where you usually have emphasis on every word because they’re each important. So yeah, sorry about that, but thought I’d point that out first.

As for the poem itself, I liked the analogies you put in it and the way it was done. You make the analogy in the first line, then in the second you put what it has to do with the person themselves, which makes each stanza a metaphor done in the same pattern.

Nicely written =).

Thanks i try to make each poem i write mean someting to me and it could appile to others as well. Oh and thanks for pointing that out I'm Dislecisic(probly spelled this wrong) and don't see stuff like that when i write.

I really like your poem. It's wonders are in it's simplicity. It has metaphores and delivers the message clearly, without complicating anything.

Thanks this is one of my Fav Poems I have written.